Thursday, January 26, 2012

My open letter to the Indianapolis Colts about their crappy website

From: Scott Bolander
To: dan.plumlee@colts.nfl.net; webmaster@colts.com; jim.irsay@colts.com; jirsay@colts.com; irsayj@colts.com

The facebook thing on your colts.com website that scrolls out from the left side of the screen whenever you foolishly move your mouse in that area is about the most annoying website “feature” I have seen in years. I go to porn and gambling sites that have less annoying moving ads. Daily.

Is it REALLY that important to try to trick people into clicking on it that you have to annoy the hell out of everyone in the process? Don’t you guys want people to like you as you are? Do you really have to trick them?

The sad thing is, I have ALREADY “liked” you guys on facebook! Shouldn’t it at least spare me and just screw over the bastards who hold out? Why not punish them?

I have been in IT for years and was doing things on the internet while you were still in grade school, and I have never seen something this annoying and pointless on a legitimate website.

I accidentally clicked on the damn thing three times when I was trying to pause the press conference today. I’m a IT guy, what do you think that Ma and Pa Kettle are experiencing? Each time I had to reload the video and wait for it to spool up so I could get back to where I had been.

On another note, your video player does not allow you to skip ahead unless you download the whole damn video (which seems to be running on a server in someone’s basement with a fat 56k pipe). What, you guys get free bandwidth or something? It’s like something from 2002. Go to youtube, go to espn, go to . . . well anywhere, really. I cannot even remember the last time I watched a video that would not let you skip ahead until it buffered the entire thing.

I wish I had the time to create some sort of flash app that runs from this e-mail, so that every time you tried to close it, reply, or delete, something moved in your way. Maybe my rectal MRIs or pictures of my cats – you know, something that you do not care about and do not want to see, constantly blocking you from performing legitimate actions.

It’s always possible that this is some sort of vandalism, you *could* have been hacked by a patriots fan or something.

Maybe I’ll tweet something to the owner, Mr. Irsay about it, because I can’t imagine that you or anyone else still with the organization actually comes and looks at the site. Because anyone in a position of power who has any kind of normal sensibilities would not allow something like that to exist.

This picture describes how I think the person who thought a annoying LIKE US thing sliding all over the screen sees the poor bastards who come looking at colts.com:

A typical colts fan "enjoying" colts.com



Please make it stop.


Scott Bolander

No comments:

Post a Comment